Seek My Tears

The same date every year, the same protagonist but the different plot.

Tomorrow will be my 23th birthday. I really want to say something special for it, because I'm so different from the girl one year ago.

My boss once said I'm one of those who are thinking too much of themselves. So at this moment, I want to change my life, I want to look at people around me, and I want to thank them.

I want to thank my parents: thank you for giving me the opportunity to enjoy my colorful life.

I want to thank my friends: thank you for providing me assistance (and those presents, I really like them).

I don't know whether I can be a success but I will try my best to be a happy girl because I know that is what they want me to be.

Best wishes to those who love me and whom I love.

For I don't know whether there will be anyone who remembers my birthday, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to myself, hehe~~

 

It seems that I'm at the moment of decision of my life, what is different is if you were standing on the crossroads you have at least one choice, but I haven't got any of choices.

Sometimes when I am alone, I feel excited about leaving college and entrance to society; sometimes I feel frightened because of the uncertainty of my future. I usually suffer from insomia recently, maybe it can be seen as a symble of maturity, maybe it is a compulsory stage of growing up. Anyway I'm experiencing it and I hope it can pass as soon as possible.

Humen are strange creature: you feel tied if your job is hard, but if there is nothing you can do, you will feel miserable. Then it will be worse. Unfortunately, I'm in the second condition.

I believe there is no saviour this time. I must save myself. I'm not sure whether I can or not, but as I have to, I will try my best so as to avoid any regret. Recently I am immersing myself in PRISON BREAK for what I need now is courage. I hope I can become more brave and brave enough before I am defeated by the frustrations coming soon.

Tomorrow I will be on the train taking me back home!

My mood is a little complicated: happy but also nervious. I don't know why. Maybe I have been used to staying at one place lonely, so when the moment of gathering comes I'm still not ready yet.

Anyway, it should be a happy thing to meet my mama and papa again. I love this old couple. Hehe, they are always ready to help me solve my personal problems, both material and psychologic ones, any problem appearring in my life. They are mystical in my eyes, because it seems there are no problems they can't deal with. So I really want to say THANK YOU to them and also to my Father for making me be their daughter.

Look forward to the coming happy holiday...

I have just finished watching a movie, named the pursuit of happiness, with Will Smith as the main actor. It's a story about how a poor guy turned to be a success. I should say that Will's performance is perfect. I know this is not his story( because he becomes an actor instead of a stock broker, and this  movie is said to be inspaired by a true story) but he performs it as his own life--true and moving.

I don't know whether it is still the real situation in America that everyone is owning his dream and trying his best to make it come true. Great changes have taken place after all. People today seem much disappointed to the society and to their life. And with the feel of disencouragement nobody will pick up their dreams or pursue their marvelous ideals.  After seeing this movie, however, I'm full of passion not because it ensures me that people still own their dreams but for one sence of Will impresses me: happiness is something to be pursued.

It seems to be telling me some truth:

         what you want is waiting for you on the way of your pursuit.

Maybe it's just because I'm worried too much about results, I miss a lot.

I also have my dream although it's not so great as those who are famous, but I think I still have the chance to feel the same happiness they have felt in the process of pursuing their dreams, because I will pursue mine.

Never say you can't; people would like to say you can't because they can't, but you should not say so. You can, and I can. If there is something you want, just go for it.